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Middleborough Rd

by Tripod

/
1.
I always get into stuff Just as it's finishing being cool I'm never quite brave enough To take a chance on something new That's for someone else to do Oo-oo-ooo-oo I'm never too far behind I follow the trends But I never take any risks I'm not ahead of the pack I'm just with the pack Towards the back I know all about moshing They do it in pits I'm quite the Pearl Jam fan I just bought their greatest hits Woh-Oh I'm thinking of getting a nose ring Now that I've seen one on Neighbours Oo-oo-oo-ooo-oo I always get into stuff Just as it's finishing being cool I've got a Razor scooter out the back Which I bought in 2002 Oo-oo-oo-ooo-oo Oo-oo-oo-ooo-oo Taking a chance That's just not for me If there's four levels of cool Then I'm at level three It goes: Freakishly cool people first Cool people next Then there's me And then my mum I never try to set a trend 'Cause I've been hurt before The only time I went out on a limb It didn't work out for the best A bandanna round my chest Over a vest I always get into stuff Just as it's finishing being cool Taking such big fashion risks That's for rockstars to do You can afford To wear whatever you like When you get that much poontang Do you like that word? Poontang? I think it's cool What do you think? Me neither
2.
Boobs 02:31
I typed my own name into an internet search engine And all I got was boobs There goes my day again There goes my day again What's a man supposed to do? No matter what I type into the damn search engine All I get is boobs There goes my day again There goes my day again All I seem to ever get is boobs. Everyday I have the purest of intentions But I get ambushed by this time wasting invention Time wasting invention I'm not talkin' 'bout the net I'm talkin' 'bout boobs (oooooo) Boo boo boobie doo boo boo There goes my day again There goes my day again These days when I'm on the net I just cut the crap and type in boobs
3.
I'm trying to impress the bargirl by seeing how drunk I can get I can't believe that no one's thought of this before This is a fool-proof plan I'm sure I'm the man of her dreams The drunker I get The more impressed she seems It's the perfect plan! I'm trying to impress the bargirl by seeing how drunk I can get My friends have left I guess they didn't want to cramp my style She keeps a professional distance But I know what she truly thinks If she didn't want me Why would she keep bringing drinks? It's the perfect plan! So I asked her when does she get off And she answers where do I get off And I said that's funny The bouncers watch me intently I suppose they're just jealous of me Because I'm so funny She's going a little bit blurry Something is coming towards me I think I'm about to be kissed No that's just a fist
4.
If I had a tattoo I would get one of you Or at least of a generic woman's body And draw your head on with a texta If I had a tattoo I would get one of your name Or at least I'd get the alphabet And circle all the letters that I needed You know I wanna stay with you forever Spend eternity with you There's nothing that our love won't last us through But a tattoo, just seems so permanent If I had a tattoo I would get one of you Or at least of a generic woman's body and draw your head on with a texta If I had a tattoo I would get one of your name Or at least I'd get the alphabet and circle all the letters that I needed You know I wanna stay with you forever Spend eternity with you There's nothing that our love won't last us through But a tattoo just seems so permanent So I got a tattoo From a temporary tattoo parlor The tattoo it stayed on but the parlor's gone
5.
Snapshots 03:39
Snapshots of a childhood Pictures of a boy How can they be photos of me? Seems so unfamiliar Seems so long ago Looks like a foreign country How did I get from there to here? Who is this boy that I see? I think you've given me the wrong film back again How many times does this have to happen? Now, some Indian looking kid Has photos of me at Dreamworld I don't care if other customers are waiting No, I will not lower my voice Don't look at them They're not gonna help you What are you prepared to do for me? Oh I just remembered What's on the rest of that film You've got a lot of explaining to do When the woman in the sari comes back I'm pretty sure her religious beliefs Are not in line with the contents of my photos When I think about the boy in those photos I wonder what he thinks of me I hope that Indian woman doesn't judge me I have a lot of respect for her culture I've read all my Salman Rushdie I really can't express how mortified I am about this situation Fuck this I'm going digital
6.
There was a hot girl in the comic shop And I didn't know what to do There was a hot girl in the comic shop She was looking at the Doctor Who There was an actual girl in the comic shop What a momentous day I had to check to make sure that she wasn't just A human-sized cardboard display My competition was a kid with pimples and a guy in a wheelchair And so I knew I had to act fast There was a hot girl in the comic shop Where I've never seen a girl before A kind of indie-looking girl in the comic shop And she knew her way around the store Oh my Lord she's moving towards the role playing games Oh my God she's picking out dice So many questions in my mind What would be a good pick up line? Why had a hot girl just come in? If the Hulk fought Spiderman who would win? I guess that Spiderman's advantage would be his webs And his manual dexterity But then again the Hulk's endurance is limitless And he' stronger then spidey would be He's got the healing factor And the proportional strength But there's the schizophrenia But there's the photography skills It's so hard to know Hot girl Hot girl There was a hot girl in the comic shop About ten minutes ago There was a hot girl in the comic shop Did anyone see her go? Had she come to the comic shop Looking for love? I guess I'll never know
7.
I watch a weary old man with his briefcase Each year of city life a wrinkle on his tired face Is this the man that I will turn into? Then I think of you Somewhere across the city You are on a train Looking at a wrinkled lady We should get out of here baby We'll take the road out to the countryside my dear Where the mountains go forever And the birds are always near We'll build a better life We'll leave the city far behind us Living where the outside world will never find us Stockpiling weaponry Ly ly ly ly ly ly, bazookas ly ly ly Ly ly ly, hand grenades ly ly ly ly ly ly Ly ly ly ly ly, booby traps ly ly ly ly Ly, bunker network ly ly ly ly ly ly ly Ly ly ly ly ly ly ly ly ly ly ly guns Ly ly ly ly ly ly ly fade out ly ly ly Ly ly ly ly black helicopters...
8.
Stuntman 02:12
Being on television Is a dream come true I get to play dress-ups all day long Too-too-oo-oo-oo-oo I got to be a superhero I got to be a singer in a band But it's not quite perfect Living in TV land 'Cause my stuntman Stuntman Stuntman Is a woman Out of the entire Stunt community A woman was The one who had the closest Body shape to me When all the action starts I just sit and stew 'Cause they get a girl to do the things That I'm too wussy to do 'Cause my stuntman Stuntman Stuntman Is a woman 'Cause my stuntman Stuntman Stuntman Is a woman And the stunts they get her to do Aren't even that stunt-y If he needs a stuntman to stand on a box It's a bit affront-y There was this one scene Where I get hit by a truck But they didn't even use her They used a dummy Of a woman This situation Was not part of my plans She soaks up all the glory While I'm sitting alone in the van 'Cause it takes a woman Woman Woman To make me look like a ...man
9.
On behalf of all the geeks I'd just like to say I've been telling you all along That Lord of the Rings was cool He told you so many times I told you He told you so many ways I told you I wore a cloak to school every day But who's laughing now? Ha ha ha Now you'll all do as I did You'll name your first child "Bilbo" Now you'll all do as I did You'll do a short course in fletching That's arrow manufacture you amateurs But don't try to catch up now It's too late to make amends You were far too busy with girls and cars and sport And friends
10.
Fly So High 01:23
I never thought I could fly so high When I met you I touched the sky You sent me flying higher than I've ever been Who would've thought you'd be such a crack shot With a rocket launcher? When I first saw you I went to pieces My heart exploded and the rest of my body did too Where have you been all my life Apparently just behind that bush Lying in wait, stocked up and ready to fire Suddenly you just appeared in my life And now I'm in heaven
11.
Well now honey We've had a good life you and me All these years we've been so happy But now lately Things just ain't working So I think it's time to just let it be That's why I'm sending you This text message To let you know that we're through Concisely It was great G-R-8 To be 2-B With you W-I-T-H-U But now honey H-1-E Oh, we're through T-H-R-U I wish that I had predicted That it would end this way Just like my phone can predict What I wanna say It was ace Bad Cad Ace And I hate Have Gave Gate Hate To lose Lord Lose Lore ah! Jose Kore Jord Lord Lose What we had you and I But I'm not the right guy I don't wanna see you cry I'd rather did (Mobile phone tone) Die
12.
Old Money 03:10
I'm at a moment in my life When I want more Than just a pretty little head Some random girl to warm my bed No instead I'm gonna hold out Cause I finally know exactly what I want Old money old money I'd really like to meet a girl who comes from Old money old money Some pointless twit who thinks I'm scum She's got to be the kind of girl Who wouldn't know How to toast a piece of bread The kind of girl who if you said "Where's the laundry?" She would answer "How the hell would I know, is it near the stable?" And at the table I would mispronouce the food and she would laugh at me Her parents scowl As I get confused by all the fancy cutlery They're just plain better than me Old money old money Ooo yeah ooo yeah She'll always be extremely rude to the help And when she's not around The help will then be rude to me 'Cause they can see I've got no place here She's just using me to get back at her father And the butler Is the only one who's ever really nice to me We play at dice And he teaches me the finer points of falconry Until the night her father summons him up to the study The next day we go fishing him and me I'm unpacking my sandwich when he throws me in the water And bashes me with an oar untill I drown Yeah that'd be sweet. Old money old money She'll look back at me as just a fad Old money old money Old money old money She's only using me to get back at her dad
13.
Doo doo Doo doo Doo doo doo doo Doo doo Doo doo Doo doo doo doo Baby gonna make you happy tonight Gonna make you happy tonight Oh sugar Give my love to you oh, baby Gonna make you feel so right Gonna make you, make you happy Oooh sugar Spend some time with you do the things you want me to We're gonna make love Gonna make some sweet sweet love sugar So get ready Oh get ready get ready Ready for lovin' tonight Before we get down to love Before we get down I just gotta finish this level I've got a high score tonight And I just wanna save my game Well I'll be with you in a minute sweet darling baby honey I love how you dance for me Could you move a little to the left baby? I can't see the TV Baby I can't wait 'till we start It's just that the save points are quite far apart In this game, baby This bit's got a multiplayer section baby Maybe you can operate a turret with me Would that be romantic baby? Games give you hand-eye coordination And spatial intelligence together with map-reading skills Oh sugar Turn the lights down low Turn the lights down just a little bit lower baby Turn the lights down low Turn the lights down low Turn the lights down low It's just that it helps me feel like I'm in a spaceship And we can make some Sweet sweet love, honey Sugar Baby Ooh you lookin' so great to me baby Have you brushed your teeth yet? Take your time no hurry It's just that I'm not tired Are you tired? I'll see you in the bed then You might want to take a book Baby Ooh you so fine baby You know I can't stop thinking about you baby And all of the magic coins that I need to collect Before I can come to bed baby It's just if I can find enough secret areas Then I can get the bonus points and we can make love Yeah! I think this X-Box Is the best present I've ever bought for you Baby
14.
Let's take a walk my love Down by the river my baby Down where we used to go Until the day when we found that body Please don't forget my love It was our favorite spot once Please don't let one bloated corpse ruin all our memories I know you slipped down a muddy embankment And landed on a rotting body Please don't let that spoil that place for you 'Cause don't forget we kissed there too "Oh come on baby, get over it. I love you so much better than that dead body. I'd hate to think our relationship hung by a thread of whether we saw a body or not. Hey look, I kept a memento: it's the stick we poked it with. Oh come on baby!" Da da da da... Ohhhh the memories were fantastic Except for one guy wrapped in plastic Down where we used to go Untill the day when we found that body
15.
Santa Fe 02:02
It was a cold and rainy night in Santa Fe But I was in Melbourne So it didn't affect me in any way And the rain on the all faces on the lost and lonely crowd I imagine would have been quite unsettling I never go anywhere And the sailors grin with rotting teeth in Santa Fe Now I'm just making it up And the whores look out the windows of the whore districts Do they have whore districts? Maybe they're just spread out more discreetly Anyway either way they would definitely have windows I never go anywhere You can hope to God when you arrive in Santa Fe That I am not your tour guide I don't even know where it is Is it cold is it even in America? Do they speak Spanish? It sounds like they would speak Spanish But how would I know I never go anywhere If there's one thing I could tell you about Santa Fe... (Long pause) ...Nup
16.
Trees 02:39
The trees are dying I'd hate to be a tree in this new century The trees are crying I'd hate to have what's down to a tree done to me 'Cause they cut them down and turn them into wood They rape entire forests for the corporate good A million awful things are done trees But worst of all Worst of all Trees get chained to hippies Trees get chained to hippies Free the trees! I'd rather have a squirrel store his nuts in me Help I'm chained up to a hippie Free the trees Smokin' dope right near me Free the trees And not offering me any (ree the trees Playing bongos badly Whoa whoa whoa Free the trees Oh If I fall in the forest no one's gonna hear me but these fuckin' hippies Free the trees You know I'd rather be a table Free the trees I think I'd rather be woodchips Free the trees I'd rather be cigarette papers that's for sure Uh yeah uh yeah come on Free the trees free the trees free the trees I've made my point quite clearly. Am I laboring it now?
17.
Astronaut 04:17
I know what you're all wondering Have Tripod ever been to Japan? You're ignoring a much bigger question Why don't the Japanese have a space program? Why aren't there any Japanese astronauts? Have you ever seen a Japanese astronaut? I'll tell you why you haven't seen one I'll tell you why Because you can't do The Japanese tea ceremony when you're an astronaut It's those damn fat gloves Fat gloves And you can't do You can't do The Japanese tea ceremony when you're in zero grav 'Cause the tea goes everywhere The tea goes everywhere Japanese culture has always fascinated me From their traditions to their modern way of life But all their elegance and rich history Doesn't sit well with my interest in space Because you can't carry out a ninja-style assassination dressed as an astronaut It's the luminous fabric You're too visible And they don't let you Use a samurai sword when your an astronaut You might puncture the suit You might depressurise Like a Gremlin in a microwave But it's those damn fat gloves Fat gloves They're the main problem You can't nurture your Tamagochi Fat gloves You can't make an origami swan And have you ever tried getting a used panty vending machine into a space shuttle? Well I've tried They don't let you Fucking NASA red tape I couldn't reconcile the two things that I loved So I threw away my dreams of outer space I had to find myself a whole new job Maybe in the sports arena I would find a place But you can't do The Japanese tea ceremony when you're a boxing champ It's those damn fat gloves again Fat gloves again Those confounded puffy mitts Loom right in front of my face Every night in bed I'm haunted by fat gloves Fat fat You can't drink sake You can't do bukkake Or ride a Kawasaki When you're an astronaut And they don't let you be an astronaut on Japanese telly 'Cause you're not enough of a red herring
18.

about

This album won us an ARIA! Steroided versions (courtesy of producer Cam McKenzie) of tunes we mostly wrote for the TV show Skithouse. Astronaut is the epic moster we always had in our heads when we sang it with one guitar. Completely different version of Hot Girl in the Comic Shop to the way we do it live. Old Money, our poshness fetish song with gorgeous strings. On Behalf of all the Geeks - most ridiculous key change we've done to date.

credits

released October 11, 2004

Produced and arranged by Cam McKenzie and Tripod
Recorded and mixed by Cam McKenzie
Recorded at Metropolis, Station Place, Gatesy's Place & Yon's Place
Assisted at Metropolis by Carl Schubert
Mastered by Joseph Carra at Crystal Mastering
All words and music by Tripod except the bit we stole from Bach
Tripod are Scott Edgar, Simon Hall and Steven Gates
with:
John Watson: Drums
Chris Bekker: Bass
Scod, Gatesy, Cam: Acoustic guitars
Gatesy: Electric guitars
James Black: Keyboards on track 4,5,13,16
Prentiss Clake-Jones: Cello of track 15
Sarah Morse: Cello on track 12
Yon: Trumpet
Rudy Osadnik: Violin
All other noises: Tripod and Cam McKenzie

Originally Released by: Liberation Music
Design by The Downie Breitkreuz Group
Photography by Joe Armao

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Tripod Melbourne, Australia

Tripod are three Australian men who are funny and write good songs.

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